by Leonid on 06 Jul 2006, 01:05
Losers Weepers
QUENTIN LETTS
July 6, 2006
LONDON -- English men have long prided themselves on a certain resilience. It has been this way since at least 1815, when Lord Uxbridge was hit by a cannon ball in the closing moments of the Battle of Waterloo and said, in mild surprise: "By God, I've lost my leg." To which his neighbor, the Duke of Wellington, replied: "By God sir, so you have." Today's England was, therefore, a little surprised to switch on its TV sets last weekend and find one of its best-known men weeping over the result of a soccer match.
The fellow's name was David Beckham, captain of the England soccer team. It is hard to overstate his fame in England. "Becks" is the most prominent player of his generation, a man who has made a fortune not only for his skills on the pitch but also as a male pin-up. One of Mr. Beckham's many endorsements was for Gillette razors, whose television ads linger adoringly on his chin of manly stubble. Last Saturday, that same chin wobbled with lachrymose blubbing. The England team was about to be eliminated from the World Cup in Germany and 31-year-old Mr. Beckham, a Conservative-supporting father of two, was inconsolable. Tears rolled down his cheeks like autumn raindrops. His eyes spouted like a garden sprinkler.
When the final whistle blew a few minutes later the England players, almost to a man, sat down and bawled, to be joined by thousands of England fans in the stadium and elsewhere. It was not much better the next day when Mr. Beckham announced his resignation as England captain. He could barely complete his press conference, he was so close to breakdown.
What on earth was happening to the country which bred Captain Oates? Frostbitten Lawrence Oates was the polar explorer who in 1912, not wishing to delay his comrades, stepped out of his tent to certain death with the words: "I am just going outside and may be some time." Now that was manly. That, once, was the English way. It seems hard to believe that just 94 years later an English "hero" such as Mr. Beckham could behave so drippily about the result of a ball game.
His antics have pleased liberals. The Guardian, house journal of Britain's progressives, praised his "new manishness." Voices on the right also discerned a political dynamic. Richard Littlejohn, a shock-jock columnist on the Daily Mail, thought that Mr. Beckham's "metrosexual orgy of grief" had come to represent the "feminised, feel-your-pain drivel" of the left. He called Mr. Beckham and his team mates "nancy boys."
One newspaper cartoon contrasted the football lamentations with the quiet dignity displayed at last week's 90th anniversary of the Battle of the Somme. In the first day of the Somme alone 19,240 British soldiers died. Today, however, the British people become emotional when even two servicemen are killed in Afghanistan, as also happened last weekend. Those two deaths have run high on London news agendas.
David Beckham's sniveling about a mere soccer game is ripe with comedy. The Pentagon, however, may want to bear in mind that its main ally in the war against terror is no longer quite so stoical in the face of adversity.
Mr. Letts is parliamentary sketch-writer for the Daily Mail of London.
I will put my breath into you and you shall live again.
EZEKIEL 37:14